Finally! A dark-comedy choose-your-own-adventure game written by me, actor and shenanigan-maker Emilia Copeland, about a man called Guy Kelly. A man who is apparently an actor and comedian. A man who definitely made a game about strangling a horse. A man who must now be drowned. Can Guy Kelly even be drowned? Find out for yourself, in this 20k+ word game of delicious nonsense that will surprise absolutely no-one that knows me in person.